Weds 4^th April 2012 Khumjung to Phortse (Phorche) 3810m

Breakfast is always at 7am and we aim to get on the trail by 8am.

We have a few minutes before we leave and as I am concerned at my French style loo (hole in the ground style) technique I consult some of the WWTW (Walking With The Wounded injured soldiers) guys. I explain that with nothing to hold onto I am in danger of falling into this unpleasant device and even when I get support from the rear wall and an adjacent window ledge (most Nepalese loos seem to have clear windows, in this case you can watch the cricket whilst doing your business!). The height I am depositing from coupled with the Nepalese diet, which is quite spicy at times, makes for a less precise and compact emergence than one would ideally prefer. In fact the conical spread that does ensue makes for a fairly unpleasant situation especially when one has chosen to wear flip flops during the process. Thank fully there is ample water and cleaning brushes to remediate the area but I can’t help but think my skills could be improved upon.

David Wiseman, known as Wisey, a 6 ft 5ins hulk of Yorkshire Regiment Officer listens disgustedly to my travails. ‘Yur doin it all wrong’ he says in his broad Yorkshire accent. ‘You’ve got to squat down much further, keeping yur feet flat, but keeping yur feet far enough apart so they don’t get covered’. He demonstrates, I try to emulate him, it’s impossible for me to do so. By now an interested crowd of trekkers and climbers are having trouble concealing their mirth.

The route to Phortse is epic! It is what you would expect on a Himalayan trek. We contour high above a raging glacial torrent far below. Immense steep drops to the side us. The path is only four or five feet wide and you have to negotiate porters, yaks and the occasional horse, complete with very brave rider coming the other way. A slip over the edge would mean certain death along most of the path. There are no hand rails and we wind up through a trail at often hewn into solid rock zig zaging almost vertically upwards to breach the numerous spurs we encounter, then contour back into, and along the inlets created by the numerous tributaries to the main river.

At one point a presumably wild yak is spotted above us. It seems disturbed and is shadowing our movement along the path. Well when I say ‘our’ I mean ‘my’ movement! After a couple of hundred metres this huge, hairy, horned thing is lurching around above me until I spot that just up ahead his trail meets mine. Do I let it go first or do I go first? As it is stationary and slightly behind me I decide to go first and try and get ahead by quickening my pace. Just as I get ahead of the junction a commotion of gravel, bush and panting indicates the yak has made the junction just 10m behind me. Ok .... So it dawns on me that this yak is strictly speaking a mountain cow. But is it indeed a female, or is it maybe a male? It looks kind of angry, I then realise I am wearing a red windproof. We are on one of those steep parts.  I may have an angry bull behind me and I am wearing red. What do you do in this situation? What is the considered ‘cool’ option here.....RUN for it!!!!! RUN for your life !!!!!!

Ok it wasn’t cool, but I wasn’t taking any chances. Just ahead is Bruce, one of our guides, as the path splits to make sure we don’t take the wrong route. Thankfully, unlike me, he was born cool. ‘Charging bull yak right behind me’ I splutter and take the left hand fork as directed. As relaxed as you like Bruce, with sway of the hips and a sway of his arms that any Matador would be proud of, he ushers the beast down the lower path ... I am saved! Another fairly ignominious early exit from this world has been narrowly avoided.....

Well perhaps a small element of embellishment but why ever let the truth stand in the way of a good story!

We are treated to some wonderful views of Ama Dablam, which by common consent is the climber’s favourite mountain. As an ice cream cone its rubbish, you would send it back but it’s the asymmetry which seems to be its appeal.

We also have the incredible sight of Everest and Lhotse to our front before cloud engulfs them both. With the wind already up in the valley one can only imagine how fearsome it would be up at 29,030 ft.

It’s a three hour day for the fastest and about a six hour day for the slowest. We reach Phortse in time for a 1230pm lunch. It is warm again, with the sun shining and Phortse is on the other side of the valley so we cross the river and it’s a 15 min sweaty ‘grunt’ up to the village. It is on a large wide spur and almost seems to have been hewn out of the very mountainside. It is very similar in style to Khumjung. Houses in amongst stone wall bordered fields. It’s beautiful.

Our lodge is very comfortable and as I didn’t sleep well the previous night immediately after lunch I get my big fat swede (head|) down on the pillow and push out a few ZZZeds. A few emails and its soon time for supper at 6.30pm I don’t feel too good. Maybe that training routine is catching up with me after all.

Asleep about 930pm.

Due to bandwidth issues i wont be able to include photos on thes last two posts, will try and update at Base Camp in a week